The hard thing about history is that people suck.
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Good advice here from Seth Godin on how to handle anger.
I have no idea what caused the guy in front of me in traffic to be having a bad day.
Maybe he has a stressful meeting coming up, or his butler burned his bacon at breakfast. Maybe he’s having trouble paying his rent, or his industry is under seige. All I know is that he’s weaving in and out, giving people the finger and yelling at other cars, all at the same time.
Unlike cupcakes, anger isn’t conserved.
If I have a cupcake and I give it to you, I don’t have a cupcake any more. But if someone who is angry gives you their anger, now you both might have it.
You’ve seen it too many times before. Someone is afraid, untethered or just upset about something that happened long before you walked into the room. Unbridled agita is dumped on you, spittle flying, eyes wide, personal invective unfiltered. Just feet away, the angry person is saying, “here,” and dumping vitriol in your direction.
All connection gets severed, any chance for positive engagement seems long gone. The opportunity, it seems, is to pick up some of that anger and throw it right back, where it came from.
And now, of course, both of you are having a bad day.
Shared anger destroys trust. It eliminates dialogue. It activates the lizard brain of everyone within earshot, and produces nothing of value.
No credit goes to the person who vents, who opens his spleen and shares his anger. No points for bravery or honesty or getting in touch with his feelings. Anger shared is not anger ameliorated.
Talk about it, don’t talk with it. Point it out, and then leave it there, on the floor, where, unengaged, the anger can’t help but wither and die.
TIME will choose the Person of the Year for 2012, but that doesn’t mean readers shouldn’t have their say. Cast your vote for the person you think most influenced the news this year for better or worse. Voting closes at 11:59 PM on December 12th and the winner will be announced on December 14. You can also view the Time Poll here.
What do readers of Duck Duck Gray Duck think? (The image above is just a sampling. Write-in’s allowed.)
Missing-411 is the first comprehensive book about people who have disappeared in the wilds of North America. It’s understood that people routinely get lost, some want to disappear but this story is about the unusual. Nobody has ever studied the archives for similarities, traits and geographical clusters of missing people, until now.
A tip from a national park ranger led to 3+ years and a 7000 hour investigative effort into understanding the stories behind people who have vanished. The book chronicles children, adults and the elderly who disappeared, sometimes in the presence of friends and relatives. As Search and Rescue personnel exhaust leads and places to search, relatives start to believe kidnappings and abductions have occurred. The belief by the relatives is not an isolated occurrence; it replicates itself time after time, case after case across North America.
The research depicts 28 clusters of missing people across the continent, something that has never been exposed and was a shocking find to researchers. Topography does play a part into the age of the victims and certain clusters have specific age and sex consistency that is baffling. This is not a phenomenon that has been occurring in just the last few decades, clusters of missing people have been identified as far back as the 1800’s.
Author David Paulides detailed the story of a two-year-old boy named Keith Parkins, who vanished near Umatilla National Forest. The child would eventually be found an astounding 12 miles away after being gone for only 19 hours. The journey, Paulides said, would require the toddler to venture over two mountain ranges, as well as fences, creeks, and rivers. The case, he revealed, is just one of many where children disappear and are later found “several hundred percent” outside of the grid system carefully designed by search and rescue teams.
The manuscript for the research was extremely large so the story was split between two books, Missing 411 Western United States and Canada and Missing 411 Eastern United States. The Eastern version will be released in late March and will include a list of all missing people in each edition and a concluding chapter that draws both books together for conclusions.
Some of the issues that are discussed in each edition:
• The National Park Service attitude toward missing people
• How specific factors in certain cases replicate themselves in different clusters
• Exposing cases involving missing children that aren’t on any national database
• Unusual behavior by bloodhounds/canines involved in the search process
• How storms, berries, swamps, briar patches, boulder fields and victim disabilities play a role in the disappearance
• The strategies of Search and Rescue personnel need to change under specific circumstances
I am a firm believer that a good percentage of the homeless people in America choose to stay on the streets rather than take the help that is out there for them. I also know that mental illness, addiction, and any criminal record basically ruins any chances of getting a job or qualifying for a place to live if you ae trying to do it all by yourself. This can be a life sentence for those who truly want to right their wrongs and contribute to society again.
I think we as Americans need to look more at helping those in need on our own streets before cutting a check to help those in other countries. You don’t have to give cash to a guy like Vietnam vet Tom Brusko (shown in video below). Sometimes a hamburger, some toiletries, or pair of tennis shoes can give them the hope that someone cares and that they should keep going. I don’t care what political party you are part of, helping people without judging should just happen once in awhile.
Watch this story about a homeless Vietnam vet named Tom Brusko (a.k.a., Epic Beard Man) in Oakland. He may have done this to himself, but he’s hurting and that sucks. There are millions like him across the U.S. Maybe this will encourage you to not look away next time you see someone like him.