Here’s a list of new events scheduled for the 2012 Summer Games in London. I could actually medal in a few of these:
Skullduggery
Buggery
Arsing About.
The Wank.
Taking the Piss.
Scuttlebutting.
Having a Laugh.
Getting it on, Banging a Gong.
Sodding off.
Shagging.
The Half-Arse.
Knackering.
Gap Minding.
Duck Duck Gray Duck 
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