Joe Mauer’s wedding gift registry

Maddie Bisanz

Source: Larry Brown Sports is 99% sure this is Maddie in the picture above.

Joe Mauer got engaged over the weekend, and rumor has it that he tore several ligaments when he got down on one knee to propose. The Twins catcher, proposed to fellow Cretin-Derham Hall graduate Maddie Bisanz who is a nurse, so I’m sure he’s in good hands.

So what do you get a baseball player with a $184 million contract? Here are some things that might be on his gift registry.

  • A pair of gold-plated crutches
  • Bilateral leg weakness cream
  • Clairol sideburn hair color
  • A diamond encrusted Medical ID Alert Bracelet
  • Drew Butera (to walk down the isle on the big day if Mauer isn’t 100% after the rehearsal dinner)
  • Steroid infused wedding cake 
  • Abbott & Costello’s Who’s on First DVD  
  • A wedding band designed to look like a World Series Ring
  • The classic game “Operation” by Hasbro
  • A “get well soon card”
  • A travel sized x-ray machine

All kidding aside, Minnesotans are happy for you Joe. Hope you can make it past first base on your wedding night.

Shop Twins and Mauer gear here.

What else do you think is on his registry?

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2 responses to “Joe Mauer’s wedding gift registry

  1. Pingback: Angry bride in 3,2,1… | Duck Duck Gray Duck

  2. get the bride a gift certificate to a plastic surgeon.